Friday, 25 September 2015

Zoom Out!

Quite often in our day to day lives.. we get so engrossed in the monotony of our routine, we forget what is our main purpose.
 
Most of us, are not in our ideal position at the moment.. with the best job.. best salary.. luxurious home to live in.. I have personally come across so many people who are underemployed.. they don’t tend to utilize their full potential.. Flip side of the coin, we might notice people who work two jobs.. or even three.. just to make ends meet.. and still at the end of the day.. when all you hear is words of disappointment.. from your teachers.. boss.. or family.. even your friends.. its very easy to give up.. Lose hope.. and say the dreadful words “I CANT”
 
What’s the next step.. that the humans cling to.. after they have lost hope of achieving anything.. or are not sure of where their life is leading them on to.. They attach themselves to the nasty state of “DENIAL”. In this case they do not want to think about the situation, they are escaping from it.. or they have accepted their life and their future as their present!  But is this where you want to be? Is this your goal? your destination? Or is this just moment in your journey?

We tend to blame and hold ourselves responsible for everything wrong in our life.. (Which is a good thing, because then you can change the direction to actually meet your destination!) But what do we do.. we get trapped between the first step.. of accepting responsibility for our life and the next step which is actually action to improve it.. and we get trapped with the life mantra of “jaise zindagi chal rahi hai.. usse waise hi chalne do!”
 
We get so demotivated, that we accept that we are constantly going to be in a meaningless job, or never find our soulmate.. never get married.. or never to pass to actually have a credited qualification.. Our life doesn’t make any more sense itoo to us! You keep thinking.. where am I stuck! This is not where I wanted to be..
 
Which is wrong!! Our actions and thoughts have a huge impact on life.. and our future actions..
 
What we need to realize is, that we should not take small, trivial disappointments to be the final outcome for our life..  When we are standing underneath a tall building.. all we see is chaos on the street.. lots of traffic.. probably construction work.. across the street.. a lady crossing the road with a crying child.. Does not make sense.. right? Now if you were to go on to the top of the building.. what would be the scene like.. beautiful vision.. maybe you can see the ocean on the horizon.. there is no noise.. no pollution.. no distractions.. you are calm here.. you can see the entire picture here! This is what we need to apply to our life as well!
 
 
 
We need to let go.. of the daily dose of drama.. the tiny issues.. so that we can look at the big picture! See where you started a year ago.. and where you are now.. how much you have progressed, how much you have survived! And how strong you are now.. then what you were before..
 
And the next time.. you hear complaints and disappointing statements.. or your efforts are not showing the desired results.. Keep saying “This is just a stepping stone.. and not my destination!” After all you have to motivate yourself.. no one else is coming to save you!
 
Lets try and make this a new mantra.. “This is just a stepping stone and not my destination!” Even if you said a couple of times while reading this.. I am sure it will change your outlook.. on your present situation! Learn to Zoom Out on the picture of your life.. and you will enjoy the scene, a pixelated picture is just ugly!
 
So guys, that’s it for this time’s post.. Share your thoughts in the comments sections.. how did you like this weeks blog.. and do let me know.. if you have any suggestions or comments for my future blogging adventures! Do subscribe to more Gyan.. and check out the new twitter page for ConfusedGyani along with the Facebook page.. Links in the comments section! 

Tuesday, 15 September 2015

Life lessons from the heroes of our life!

We come across so many people in our day to day monotonous life.. Some we know very well like our family and friends.. some we prefer to know as just acquaintances.. like our colleagues, classmates or teachers.. and some we don’t know at all.. complete strangers we meet in train or on the bus.. or in a restaurant..

They say, life teaches us, everything necessary to know, to survive.. true.. But life teaches us these lessons through these wonderful people we know, these people who we call our family or friends.. and sometimes, if the lesson is really really important.. life makes sure we learn it.. even if it is from the hands of a stranger! I call these people heroes.. they are the ones, that have guided me through confusing times.. served as an inspiration.. when I really needed it.. or even when I did not need it.. but was acting lazy.. anyone who has taught me an important life lesson.. whether directly or indirectly.. is a hero in my life!

Here, I would like to share a few life lessons that I have learned from the heroes of my life! Hopefully you can relate to them!

Accept your mistakes! – this is the most important life lesson, I have learnt! I have seen people throw their lives into the drain.. but take a complete U turn and personify the saying “At any given moment you have the power to say: this is not how the story is going to end”. These are the people you thought are set for doom! But prove you wrong.. when they accept their mistake.. and decide that their life is in their hands.. that they are 100% responsible for their lives! So they take all the burden with a smile and keep working to make their life a better one!

Let it go – Now this one, is tricky.. but an important lesson to learn! To let go of the things not in your control.. to let of things when you cant change them, but just have to accept them! But I have been lucky enough, where the heroes of my life did not force me to learn this.. they let the idea of forgiveness, acceptance and letting go blossom in me like a tiny flower blossoming in my heart! Because, I learnt from my heroes the more grudges and negativity you keep within your heart.. the pain “you” get, forgiving someone who does not deserve it.. is actually the best thing you can do to maintain the tranquillity of your heart and soul!



Be Silent- If you are a good human being, you will be appreciated (period.) There are no two ways to that! You might be appreciated within 5 minutes, or 5 months.. or even 5 years.. but you will get your due share of appreciation and acknowledgement! You never have to run after it! I learned this from people, who acted like fools and ran after being appreciated and respected.. they demanded it.. and did manage to get it to some extent.. but it was obvious that people did not mean to respect you.. and do it “just because!”

However, I also learned.. that people who do not ask for it.. and keep doing the good deeds in their life without any expectations.. are the ones that get the most respect and the ones that you may look up to or idolize! They never asked for it! Also, it is important to know, that these people do good.. because it generates a calm serene and good feeling within us, not for appreciation!

Resilience – life surrounds us, with both type of people.. the lazy ones and the hardworking ones.. it is your choice who you look at.. from who do you wish to learn! The resilient heroes taught me.. that if you want to achieve something, go after it.. it will not be served to you! I learned, nothing comes easy and it is necessary to be hard working towards your goal! If you don’t have it, you work hard to achieve it.. but if you are lucky enough for it to be served on a silver platter.. you still have to work hard to maintain it! There is no other way!

I have been fortunate enough to learn that overcoming any challenge should be done with a smile and lots of enthusiasm, that that is the true essence of being resilient!

Walking away – Now this one, especially goes to the people, who taught me, made me wonder “whether they were bringing negativity in my life?” and if they were.. I learned to walk away from them.. I learned to disconnect and selectively socialize! Firstly, it is not important for you to know everyone.. and know everyone’s sad story! Again, I would say.. life brings you both kinds of people.. positive and negative.. it is upto you, what you decide to learn! Everyone teaches you something.. may be big or small..

Negative people taught me.. what I should not do.. like talk about my problems for sympathy, be vengeful or two-faced.. are just some of those! And when I had already learned these lessons.. and if I be with them anymore, it is just going to bring negativity in to my life.. I cut them off! Because you are 100% responsible for your life! Your choices decide your future!

So.. those are a few life lessons that I have learned.. from the heroes of my life! Please let me know, if I missed out on any.. or share your experiences of learning the life lessons.. Any comments or suggestions on Confused Gyani’s journey up til now or for the future posts are welcome..

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