Tuesday, 26 May 2015

How to Judge People?

I understand, that is a strange topic to write on! But trust me, this is going to be a good one!

Now before we begin, lets get the hypocrisy out of the way! Those who believe and say that they are not judgmental, or don’t evaluate people need to get come out of their imaginary world! And get a reality check! Because there are only two options in such a situation: 
1. Either you are Mother Teresa
2. You don’t exist!!!! So go ahead take your pick.

Well, if you are still continuing to read this, I suppose you went for option 3. None of the above (LOL I always use this one!) Great! So, now that we have the fa├žade out of the way, lets begin!

I want you to ask yourself, what is the first thing you notice in a person? The way they appear? Their gender, height weight, color of the skin? Their past? I know, we tend to be so righteous and fair, be we ending up categorizing people on basis of certain aspects of their life, they didn’t select!

A human, does not decide, which family they are going to be born in! whether it is a rich or a poor family? Any person does not have a choice to select their skin color! (and let me make that clear.. no skin color is better than the other!) No one decides where he or she is going to be born! Most of cannot decide how tall we are going to be, or how our body structure will be!
We humans actually have no control over these aspects of life, THEN HOW CAN WE JUDGE THEM FOR IT! If you think about it, it is just not logical! 

So then how to judge a person? On their past decisions? HELL NO! you were not there, when they took those decisions, you do not know what options life offered them!
Then what? How can you judge a person? I have put down a teeny tiny list together.. I don’t mean to offend anyone with it. But this is something I use.
1.     Keep a watch for their actions and not just words: Judge them on that! How well can they keep a commitment! (Kyunki bol bacchan toh sab de sakte hai!) BEWARE of the sweet talkers, these are the people who will show that they are helping you but they are actually not! This person is the wolf from red riding hood disguised as your grandmother! So be careful and beware, little red riding hood! Don’t get your head bitten off!

2.     Keep your eyes and ears open: Most people end up talking behind your back today or tomorrow. That should be another criteria for you to judge someone. And the best part is, sometimes you don’t even have to wait for them to bitch about you. You can observe them do that with a third person! And always remember, if they can gossip about others to you, they can gossip about you as well! You ain’t any different mate!
3.     See how they utilize their time: I hate people procrastinating! Though I end up in that category once in a while, I make sure not to set up base camp there! Which is important! It is necessary to have ambitious people around you, who boost your confidence as well! Judge them on that! Not everyone has the ambition to be a millionaire! (On second thought, everyone wants too!) But are they doing anything about it!?!? Probably not!
4.     Judge them on their current decisions: if a person has a choice to do the easy thing or the correct thing.. which one do they select? That should tell a lot about a person. But before you do that, get the entire picture first!
5.     Charity Show offs: Another aspect, to judge them on.. if people you know, do charity so that they have something to talk about.. is actually not charity. You learn about their true motives and intentions.

Well, that’s on my list! Please let me know how you liked this week’s blog? And Confused Gyani’s journey until now! Please leave some nice comments below. And as you are not Mother Teresa, do share with us how you judge people and what is on your list. Also any comments and suggestions are welcome!

Monday, 18 May 2015

Priority List!

We all make these at some or the other point in our life! We make to do lists for work, uni assignments, exams schedules and lots more..
Some make these lists occasionally, some rarely and some like “The Confused Gyani” Everyday!!! I am obsessed with making to do lists, and I even make multiply ones.. I hope I am not the only crazy one. (LOL!!)

But todays question is.. What is on the top of our priority list of your life? Is it our personal.. deep down desires of the heart?? Probably work, family, our siblings and friends.. and many other random people. It’s a good thing to prioritize the important people of your life.. to give then the due importance they deserve!

But what about you? Where do you put yourself on your LIFE’S PRIORITY LIST? Usually after family, work, studies, money, debt, friends and so on.. the list never ends. This may come as a shock to you.. but it’s a fact.. we have forgotten to prioritize ourselves! 

Now, lets think logically for a second! If we don’t value ourselves enough, how do we expect others to give us the importance we deserve? We cannot justify that! So people continue to treat you, as you treat yourself! If you put yourself as the last priority on your own list.. people tend to pick that up and imply it back at you.

All the important people we come across in life, and give them that importance or respect is because that’s how they treat themselves. It moves in a cycle, you give yourself the due importance, and everyone around will respond with the same!

Now.. confused how to do that? Don’t really know? Not a problem.. begin with the small things.. pamper yourself.. because you earned it! Don’t feel guilty about it! Go for a relaxing spa, indulge in a hobby or activity? I know Indians love to play cricket, meet up on weekends and play cricket with your friends.. no matter how old you are.. whether 25 or 65! Its not about being good at the sport.. but its about enjoying yourself and making yourself happy! Give yourself the time and importance.. meditate to connect with yourself again, take up a new art, new language.. new something new.. dust the dirt off your life.. get out of  the monotony. For a change, stop cooking what your family wants, and for a change cook what you desire.. Plan a day with yourself.. go out, explore, have new experiences. Learn to enjoy your own company and then others will enjoy too!

So, get started.. Make a priority list, if you haven’t made one yet! And put yourself as NUMBER ONE! List down at least one activity a day, which makes you, feel happy and content! And soon, you will experience the change in everyone around you as well!  

Please leave a comment below! And let me know whether you liked this week’s post! Please let me know, what other topics you’ll would like to hear on! And please share your experiences.. Do let me know, what comes on your priority list? and where do you rank yourself?? Any suggestions for the next post and comments are welcome!

Also, I apologize for not being soo regular with my blogs! I will make sure that my blogging comes NUMBER TWO on my priority list now. LOL ;p